It can be very difficult to decide to leave an abusive relationship. Call your local Crisis Centre for support, the counsellors there can assist with a safety plan.
When you have decided to leave, pack a bag and leave it with a friend or neighbour. Make sure that you pack extra clothes and, if you have a child or children, pack a favourite toy. Keep an extra set of house and car keys outside of the house in case you have to leave in a hurry.
Important papers that you should take with you are:
Any medication and health insurance papers
Cheque and/or savings books
Any court papers
Women Stay in Abusive Relationships
stay in abusive relationships because they feel they have no choice. They
are afraid that they will not be able to support themselves or their children.
They are afraid that friends or family will think that they have failed.
of leaving and fear of staying…..fear of reprisal…..fear for her life
work to support herself and family…..few or out dated job skills
of legal rights…..lack of support
with situation drains energy
still love partner, especially in the "honeymoon period"
feel she is responsible for the success or failure of marriage….may have
been pressured by parents, community, church to try and hold on
responsible for abuse….that she caused it
feel that family violence is normal, especially if she was physically
abused as a child or witnessed her mother being beaten
of alternative housing may force a woman to stay.
Extended family members may not be willing or able to accommodate her and
The truth is that they are not responsible for the abuse and to stay in an abusive
relationship may result in serious injury or even death. Women NEVER like
being beaten. Family Violence and the Impact on Children
behaviour is learned and children who witness violence in the home often
become either perpetrators or victims of violence in adulthood
who witness family violence tend not to perform as well as their peers
in school, at sports and social interaction
percentage of young offenders charged with crimes against people have
been exposed to domestic violence as children
who have witnessed domestic violence have a much greater chance
of having behavioural problems
from violent homes may blame themselves, may have sleep problems, nightmares,
stomach and head aches
become withdrawn and passive, boys aggressive and bullying.